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Stupid rooms, stupid dressers, stupid desire of freedom.

February 6, 2010

I have been in a bad mood for a very long time.  Yeah, people are subjected to my anger and fuck I love being a jerk at times.  Quite honestly, I really don’t care.  I’ve been waiting for my tablet’s return than you’ve been waiting for the dresser in my room to be able to move out.  Is it SO hard to call up the freaking people who are in charge of the warranty?

Is it so hard to stop bothering me with your useless babble over why I should just do whatever you order me to do?  I make my own choices.  I’m the one in power now.  Yeah, sure I get favors from you, and I do the same.  Isn’t that enough?  But no, you want someone who I think would just drop to their knees and worship you.

Yeah, that’s what I think you want in a child.  I am deficient in all embracing others and widening my horizons.  Whatever you tell me, still effects me.  It still keeps me away from doing what I want, and what freedom I honestly don’t have.

Thank you for raising me to be just like you; a procrastinator, a cynic, demanding, selfish, and someone who is at the bottom of the cesspool.  THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH.

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The “{” and “}” will take over the world and punish your muffins and squash them like a bug.

November 20, 2009

]8 The world shall end and the sky shall fall.

I’m joining something I would never join… >> << Not if the world depended on me for it.  It’s not fatal or critical to anyone’s health, but uh… it would indeed down a few notches on the little amount of sociability.  I can sit down with you and play Hangman until you finally guess what I’m talking about, but oh well, you will find out soon enough … eventually.

One of them is Spider Solitaire, Solitaire and Computer Pinball… yay.  And pretty soon I’ll get above a 100 in my bowling class now that I’m bowling again.  I just can’t get the right steps to actually bowl … and it’s annoying my professor.  Well, at least I’m bending my knees.  That should be fine, right?  And I got a 92, let off alittle, kay?

Just remember…

F is for Foul = 0.
“-” = 0.
“X” = Strike on the first try?  Bonus ten for the next two bowls?
“/”=Strike on the second try?  No bonus, just add the next two bowls to the that one bowl… I think.

Anyways, I started setting up the smackjeeves sites for Simle Phase and 4REAL, my comics I will be starting up again.  After some moments of brief splatter of brain power and from forcing myself to consume book after book in the last week, I am able to come up with ideas–cliched ones, but still ideas.

Astronomy professor has been getting irritating and more irritating.   That is all.  Whenever I get out of class I feel absolutely belittled.  Especially in lab.

And I really wish my mother gave me slack.  Apparently, she won’t, not with how crappy I feel.  Sometimes, I rather just speak instead of writing and drawing my feelings down and freaking out when I have to explain my feelings of annoyance or anger to someone.  Is that hard to say I just rather bottle up whatever is inside of me and take it out on the walls of my room?

Get lost…

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It’s a sunny day in heaven … and I’m waiting for you.. my Fairweather friend…

November 18, 2009

I really should get to work on painting my dream project and finish it by Monday, but uh… yeah I’m really, really, really lazy.

And I miss using Silvia even though I never really used her much for Colorland on Adopt-A-Color.  Same for Sapphire Noir and Flax.

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I’m not one for changes. That is all.

November 13, 2009

In need, a dog explores quickly.  Ulster adventured the Earth.

So, anyways college clubs are on the verge of being disbanded due to a new take on the financial deficit of New York.  Which means a number of students will have to drop out of college because of certain results.  Nothing unusual at club.  RL friends are bugging me.

I’ve been feeling like my work isn’t at all that great, even with what I do in class, I am not at all that happy with it.  I just haven’t been motivated.  Like someone stomped all over my body and its as if I don’t feel the physical pain from it…  I don’t know how to describe it.  Yeah, emo I know.

Whatever.

I’m not one for changes.  That is all.

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In his eyes, he had the map of the world…

November 3, 2009

amunet_amaya

]8 Wow, I just learnt that a friend got a new girlfriend.  A quite annoying one to say the least.  ]8 -shrugs-  Anyways… I am finally drawing again ;A; … WOOOO…

And yes, I was able to gather up my courage to friend someone on dA I haven’t in more than a year.

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Happy Sneeze-lloween!

November 2, 2009

Sick and happy halloween… -goes back to doodling-

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I believe in it… Miracle Romance!

October 28, 2009

So, I basically just drew my version of Sailor Pyro. Yes, I know there are Sailor Pyros out there, Sailor Hydras and what not… that’s why I came up with Sailor Mare instead…  it’s basically about a group of senshi in another universe who WILL IN TIME need help from the original Sailor Senshi of the series–The Solar System Senshi.

I can’t really say for sure what they will need but  Iwill think of something in due time.  Because really, Sailor Moon is the most powerful of the Senshi which is proven in season Sailor Moon: Stars.  Even Kakyuu-hime went to her for help.  Question is, is Sailor Moon also Sailor Cosmos?  -blinks-  Time to re-read the manga…

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She Ricochets! But you don’t notice.

October 25, 2009

I’m quite annoyed with Corvus and quite frankly I am extremely annoyed with RL friends too.

I’m also quite annoyed with parents–livid with them.

I’m going to a baby shower that is scheduled at 1 PM and I don’t think I’ll be back until after 4 PM.  Then I’m going to try finishing my painting and prepare a canvas and then I’ll be everyone’s whore on MSN and AIM.  Will finally be able to squeeze in some oC sketching… but knowing me I’mma be lazy.

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Save this one death for me….

October 16, 2009

Okay, I fell asleep after a session of therapy from my doctor.  Went right home, thinking I could start working on a really crappy drawing I drew of Silvia and her younger self?  Nope.  I just fell asleep in the car on my Dad who was talking to me.  As a result, I freaked out when I lost my 0.7 lead mechanical pencil.

No work today, but somehow I have a feeling my friends want me to visit them today.  It’s one of those nights where my supervisors are working and I hardly stand them, so.  I was thinking about not showing up until around 5 PM and chilling a bit with Christine.  Then go home around after 6:00 PM unless it’s on Standard time and the sunsets in around the hour of 5.

I woke up today listening to “Cadence of Her Last Breath” by Nightwish and I must say that between Tarja and Annette, I think Annette would have been better for the song.  Well, of course, she is the one singing it.  -sigh-  No work today.  I am home and free of work.  And today my friends want to see Wild Things but my friend Christine asked me first and I still have to go see Nine with her.

I just really don’t feel motivated.  It seems like I’ll only be included in things now through Steven until he leaves for Georgia for Savannah College of Art and Design.  Knowing me I’d be asleep for any visit of a friend out-of-state, especially for the people I know along the West Coast.

I wanna get:

(x) Playstation Portable
(x) Playstation 3
(x) Crisis Core
(x) Dissidia
(x) Birth By Sleep
(x) Nintendo DS
(x) Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days
(x) Kingdom Hearts Re: Chain of Memories
(x) Final Fantasy XIII
(x) Final Fantasy Versus XIII.
(x) More Shin Megami stuff 8DDDD~ Yeah.

In addition to that… stuff for cosplay, money saved up for airfare, Disney in Anaheim, CA, and other stuff.  There’s always birthdays?  I mean I could always asked for gift certificates and what not.

And forbid the word “commissions” to pop up, but I have no choice I need to get buckling down with art, cleaning my room (God knows how), study, sleep, update my Colours and get working with the profiles for the dA clubs The Apartment and Underground Heroes.

And my stomach feels like beating the living shit out of me.  But that’s what you get when you wake up at 5:50 AM at first and then fall back asleep until 26 minutes later at 6:16 AM…

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Know that I … won’t consider surrender!

October 14, 2009

So, yeah I forgot to do my history homework yet again 8DDDD LOL.  Anyways, there is a midterm coming up so all I got to do is read the notes and the content in my textbook and I should be alright.  I’m kinda not happy that we don’t have minor tests… chapter tests y’know?

Anyways, in club yesterday, it was weird.  I have a feeling Jillian and Collin aren’t speaking to me for some reason.  I don’t think I care but I just find it … odd.  I just really can’t stay friends with her, yeah.  Perhaps I can talk to Rachel about it and hear what she has to say.  I’m supposed to visit her sometimes right?  But the only problem is.  I can’t exactly find where her school is. -sweatdrop-  And I hate taking railroads by myself…

All my other friends told me to forget about Jillian whatever other people have told me to do–talk to her.

-Sigh.-  I know what Rituleen and Simone have to say about this.  I dunno what I should do.  I mean I got back to club and yeah… I could only speak to Sam, Jessica, Silver, Alex, and a few other people besides Collin and Jillian.

Apparently, I am the evil one now.  Yeah.  Life is so screwed up.  Good thing is, I have my last day of the Hell hole today.  WOOT!